Whole Lot of Shakin' Going On

This morning, as I often do, I was driving to work. The last leg of my commute is up a winding mountain road with a state route number. It's one lane each way, or a two lane road, however you think of it, my point is that it's a winding mountain road that goes through a residential neighborhood.

As I traversed this part of my route, I noticed a deer running hell-for-leather diagonally across the lawn to my right, headed - headed for a collision course with my car. I slammed on the brakes. I wasn't fast enough, or it was too late, because BAM! I hit the deer and it went down. Pretty sure I was yelling something like "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" while that happened. My heart beating a mile a minute, I watched the deer flounder, then stand up, shake itself off (minus some huge tufts of fur) and RUN AWAY. Jesus, deer are tough. I slowly hit the gas on my car, and everything seemed OK, driving-wise. I noticed that the car in front of me had slowed, but it took off when it saw me moving.

Shaking like a leaf, I continued the approximate 3 more miles in to my office. I looked at my car, and the frame for my license plate is broken. The plate itself is still riveted to the car, so, OK. A seriously small amount of damage, considering what could have happened.

Still shaking, I walked in to the office, headed to the ladies' room, went to the fridge to put my lunch in, and started thinking about how the car in front of me had slowed down...

The car in *front* of me.

I am now so, so glad that there wasn't a car behind me.

Economic Recovery

Today in the mail I got:

• A letter explaining that a certain Corporate Bank can help me if I'm having trouble making my payments
• 2 Debt reduction/debt forgiveness solicitations
• A letter explaining that the limit on my Macy's card, which has a zero balance, has been reduced
• An offer for a new credit card that will give me airline miles

In my email, I received a notice that, since I'm such a good customer, the limit on one of my credit cards has been increased.

This gives me the impression that, as a nation, we don't know what the f**k we're doing.

Smuggling Golf Balls

"My throat feels like it's closing up," he said.

I offered him tea or coffee.

Why didn't I put on a surgical mask and keep 20 feet back?

My throat feels like it's closing up. Bah.

...And Then I Went Soft

Seriously, when did I start liking babies?



I wasn't even washing her off as dinner preparation or nothin'! In fact, it was her mother washing her off in my sink, but man, that's just cute.

Proud to Have Known Her

My cousin (1st, once, removed) Lila Weinberg passed away last weekend, this is her obituary from the Chicago Tribune.

I am proud to have known her, and lucky to have been her relative.

Random Update

1) Haven't even thought about working on my template until I looked at my last post.

2) Actually moved my friend's web site. Thank goodness.

3) BNL are playing at Jenk's on 5/28 at some unspecified hour between 6 and 10am. Do I dare even try to fight that crowd? I think I might be too broken for that one, and it's crushing.

4) Climate change exists. Do people cause it, or would it have happened anyway? I believe people cause it. I can see arguments for natural patterns. I cannot see arguments against trying to make the world a better place as anything but selfish and short-sighted. Basically, I have no hard proof that trying to do the right thing will succeed, but I have evidence that things at least suck less when we try.

I also believe that people who make jokes about global warming being a hoax whenever they get chilly weather between May and September are just doing that to annoy me.

Still Haven't Figured Out

I still have not figured out how to fix my template so that it stops looking so stupid. In related news, my friend wants me to help her figure out how to keep her blog going after 5/1, when Blogger stops offering FTP uploads. I am well and truly screwed, here. There's a post about switching it to Blogger hosting by pointing the DNS file at Google-hosted servers WHICH I DO NOT WANT. Her blog isn't the only thing at that URL, and her account at pair.com doesn't have a database, or a way for me to specify subdomains, or ANY of the advanced crap I'd have to do to make this work without changing her URL. Plus, all the "free" hosting services that include their name in the URL (e.g. blogger, wordpress), her domain name is ALREADY TAKEN,. so changing her URL went out the window, anyway.

I'm right f*cked as far as helping her out, here, I've been trying for days. I do not know what to do. Anyone at all have any ideas? Anyone?

New Is the New New

I have a new microwave. I am very happy about it. It's all stainless steel, and pretty, and installed above my range, and it has a button on it that says "Reheat", so I don't even have to think.

I know you're all happy for me, too.

Surprise for April

Now that everything is thawed and the torrential rains have ended, I notice that my sage plant survived all of it, and so did the thyme. I love you, herb plants!

Guest Post!

Today, a post by Barbara O'Brien, from Mahablog:

Health Care Reform: The Morning After

Many politicians and pundits warned us that the health care reform (HCR) legislation that just became law will destroy America. Government bureaucrats will take over health care decisions, we were told. The old and infirm would be hauled away by death panels. Everything about the way we receive our medical care will change, and change drastically, they said.

Medicare recipients have been frightened by stories that their benefits will be cut. Middle-age people are worried they will lose their jobs when the law’s dreaded regulations, or taxes, or maybe regulations with taxes, would destroy their employers’ businesses.

The truth is, very little will change for most people. If you were insured by employee benefits before HCR, you will be insured by exactly the same policy in exactly the same way after HCR. You will have access to the same doctors on the same terms. “Government bureaucrats” will no more be involved in your health care than they were before.

And the same is true of Medicare, which of course is a government program, although many of the people who opposed the HCR bill don’t seem to know that.

Here are the “cataclysmic” changes to health care that are now in effect, or which will go into effect within the next six months for people who are already in group insurance plans:

• The law says you can’t lose your insurance coverage because you get sick. Before, in many states, if you were stricken with a severe illness such as mesothelioma cancer that would be expensive to treat, your insurer could use just about any excuse to cancel your coverage. That is over.


• HCR has ended lifetime limits on coverage. As long as you are receiving medical care, your insurer pays the bills.


• Your children can be covered on your existing policy until they are 26 years old.


• In six months,
  insurers cannot refuse to insure people under the age of 19 because of "pre-existing conditions." This provision will go into effect for everyone in 2014.

And if you are on Medicare, you will be asked to struggle with the following:

• You get a free annual checkup.


• The co-pays and deductibles on many preventive care services are eliminated.


• If you are in the Medicare D "doughnut hole," you will get a $250 rebate check in a few weeks. The hole itself will be closed gradually and will be gone by 2020.

But what about all those terrible regulations and taxes that are about to drive businesses out of business? Um, there really isn't much to report. Oh, wait, here's one — a 10 percent tax on indoor tanning services that use ultraviolet lamps will go into effect July 1. That's about it.

However, beginning this year a tax credit will be available for some small businesses to help provide insurance coverage for employees.

Soon the politicians and pundits will start trying to frighten you about the provisions that will go into effect after this year. I assure you they are about as scary as the provisions that go into effect this year, but I will discuss them in a follow-up post.
— Barbara O’Brien

Two Faced

Saying that you're in favor of women's reproductive rights, but not if the government has to shell out money for them is NOT GOOD ENOUGH.

"We regret that a pro-choice president of a pro-choice nation was forced to sign an Executive Order that further codifies the proposed anti-choice language in the health-care reform bill, originally proposed by Senator Ben Nelson of Nebraska," said Cecile Richards, president of PPFA (the Planned Parenthood Federation of America). She also said her group is "grateful" that the executive order does not "include the complete and total ban on private health insurance coverage for abortion that Congressman Bart Stupak had insisted upon."

OK, so she's glad that we didn't get screwed as badly as we could have? We should continue to push against those who would hold us down. Under water. Until we stop breathing. Yeah, we should push against those people as hard as we can.

Hey, It's My Forum, Right?

Note to the SCA world:

I have a day job, and so does everyone that lives in my house. We are not home to sign for your reservation form that you sent "Priority Mail". In fact, sometimes, we're on vacation. Do NOT send things we have to sign for, it's just silly. For goodness sake, it's not like you've sent us cash.

And don't get angry if your letter got returned because we weren't there. If you'd sent it regular mail, that never would have happened.

Out Of My Own Pocket

Any English tutors out there need some extra cash? I'm willing to pay someone if they can fix the way that Sara Palin speaks. It hurts my heart to listen to the way she puts sentences together.

PALIN: Well, one, you don't take away their First Amendment rights. And we say you cannot speak about those things or ask those questions that you want answers to. That's part of democracy at work is those…

Oh, and of course, the fact that she isn't paying attention to the people she's supporting at ALL, that bothers me, too.

"That's part of democracy at work is those...". Please, help her, before she speaks again.

Tragedy

I haven't had time to watch ONE MINUTE of the Olympics. I like the Olympics!

Personal Usage

Why I own technology: To make extra money, to keep in touch with my friends, and to play. I want to watch TV, work with images, and play games.

A lot of the games that I play in my free time are in Flash. I want to play them on the technological devices I buy. Apple is making this an issue for me.

Why doesn't Apple want more of my money? Just sayin'.

Beachy

Luckily, I have this forum where I can express my opinion of the MTV show "Jersey Shore". No link, if you don't know of it, you're VERY LUCKY and shouldn't try to find it.

Anyway, I wanted to express my opinion about the show: I don't like it. I turned it on, and made it through 10 whole minutes before turning it off. Yup, those people are real, and are not putting the country on. Yup, those people can be found in many different areas of the Jersey Shore. I have known those people, and I do not like those people. It has been a bit of an effort - an effort that I did indeed make - to be able to go to the beach in New Jersey without encountering people like that on purpose. Having spent so much time trying to avoid them in real life, I am absolutely not about to watch them on TV.

Thanks, people who read my blog, I feel better now.

Everybody Knows

Yesterday I pre-ordered "A Singer Must Die" by Steven Page and The Art of Time. I don't think I could have helped myself - I mean, come on, Leonard Cohen.

I hope it's good. The Vanity Project was hard to listen to in one sitting, the tracks need breaking up.

The Bachmann-Hinchey Scale

As an early Christmas gift, I present for your use in Internet flame wars and grudge matches, a new tool for evaluating the sheer craziness of comments made either by yourself or your opponents. Named the "Bachmann-Hinchey Hyperbole Scale," it will allow you to gage the relative sanity or sheer craziness of statements and charges served up on the web. It is primarily intended for use in political debate, as the name should imply, but it may also be used in arguments about pop culture, Hollywood starlets, sports, or most any other thing you'd care to vent about.

This fifteen point scale is divided into three sections, color coded for your convenience.

In the Green Band, meriting a score of zero through five, the debate remains "Calm."

A "Calm" debate will generally include measured, reasoned arguments, citations of established facts and links to respected reference sources. The opponents will treat each other's debate points respectfully, while perhaps not agreeing, and allow for the possibility that the other person may be correct, at least in some areas.





In the Orange band, the argument moves to "Heated" status.


Heated debates, with a score of 6 to 10, are generally characterized by insults - either thinly veiled or overt - resulting in ad hominem attacks, unlinked references to rumors or urban legends, and slippery slope arguments which take hypothetical examples to illogical, ridiculous extremes. There may still be valid facts and arguments included, but they are frequently overshadowed by angst and anger.


Finally, in the Red band, earning scores of 11 to 15, we finally move into "Bat Shit Crazy" territory.

To earn scores in this range, the author must really leave the realm of common sense behind. These arguments will include (as the name of the scale implies) claims such as New York Congressman Maurice Hinchey stating that President Bush intentionally allowed Osama bin Laden to escape in Afghanistan or Minnesota Representative Michele Bachmann calling for Congressional investigations into the loyalty and patriotism of the rest of the members of Congress. References and citations in such arguments never include any links to verifiable sources and frequently involve assertions which are physically impossible. Bonus points are awarded in this category for comparisons to the Holocaust, slavery in early America, pedophilia or beastiality.

I hope this helps. Now, go forth and argue with all of the clueless twits around this wonderful series of tubes we call the Internets and give them a piece of your mind!

Every Day is Children's Day

My Dilbert calendar says that today is Human Rights Day. Seriously? Shouldn't that NOT be one day of the year?

Speaking of Monsters

I'm 41 years old, now. I cannot imagine what I've been doing all that time.